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tongue

Part 5, Name That Tongue – Healing or Hurting?

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“A gentle tongue [with its healing power] is a tree of life, but willful contrariness in it breaks down the spirit.”
Proverbs 15:4 AMP 

I watched a movie recently called Parental Guidance starring Billy Crystal (as Artie) and Bette Midler (as Diane). As grandparents, they had pretty much failed due to misunderstandings between them and their only child.  Artie had also lost his dream job as a baseball announcer and was eagerly hoping for an audition with another team. In the meantime, Artie and Diane had an opportunity to watch their three grandkids for a week and were eager to redeem themselves in the sight of the family.

One of my favorite scenes is an honest discourse between Diane and Artie. Everything has gone wrong, and they seemingly have failed at being responsible grandparents in the eyes of their daughter. Here is the dialogue.

Diane:  I followed you for 35 years, Artie. Wherever you needed to be, that’s where I was. No complaints. Well, some. But this week … this week was supposed to be about us and our grandchildren. Not you. Not you. Did you have to go to that audition?

Artie:  It’s not one of my better moments.

Diane expressed her true feelings and spoke words of hard truth. However, how she said them made all the difference. She didn’t rant and rave over the fact that she was right. Nor did she become a drama queen and make him feel bad with her tears. Artie realized his selfishness and responded appropriately, admitting his wrong.

Our words, according to Proverbs, can bring healing or harm depending on what and how we say them. God dealt with me years ago about my tainted tongue. He used the following verse to convict my heart of the damage I was doing, especially toward my loved ones.

“There is one who speaks rashly like the thrusts of a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.” Proverbs 12:18, NASB

 

Ouch! That’s a hard one, but one I revisit often to keep my lips under control. I don’t want my speech to cut and wound due to my uncaring thoughtlessness. Instead, I long for God to bring life and health to others through my communication.

 

It’s never too late for a tongue check-up. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you speak with soothing sweetness and control. Seek to be pleasant and gentle in all you say. It takes practice, but it’s so worth it.         [Digging deeper – Psalm 57:4; Prov. 15:26b; 16:21, 23-24, 31:26]

Taming the tongue,

Beverly <><

 

 

Photo Credit: Image courtesy of worradmu at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Part 3, Good Mouth, Bad Mouth

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“The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.”
Proverbs 10:11 NASB

Because there are over one hundred verses relating to the mouth, lips, tongue, and speech found in Proverbs, it’s impossible to cover the wealth of information in five short doses. So, hang with me as I attempt to whet your appetite to do further study on your own. With that in mind, I want to zoom in on chapter 10 of Proverbs and compare the mouth of the righteous to that of the wicked and foolish person.

We read in Matthew 15:18 that the things that proceed out of the mouth come from the heart. If in my very being I focus on God, then according to verses in Proverbs 10, my upright speech is like a fountain of life (vs. 11). It flows with wisdom (vs. 13, 31), is like choice silver (vs. 20), feeds many (vs. 21), and brings forth what is acceptable (vs. 32).

On the flip side, a heart focused on self and the world is more likely to let unkind, hurtful, and shameful words spew forth. The foolish, wicked mouth hides violence (vs. 6, 11), brings ruin (vs. 14), will be cut out (vs. 31), and is perverted (vs. 32). Let’s avoid these pitfalls at all costs by never letting sin go unchecked in our lives. Thank goodness, we serve a merciful God who forgives us when we confess our sins. Unlike having our mouths simply washed out with soap, His cleansing goes all the way to the heart.

One last thought and I close. Have you ever been burned by fire? I remember checking the broiler of a gas stove and having a blast of flames hit me in the face. It about scared me to death! A quick check revealed singed hair around my temples, as well as my eyebrows and eyelashes; the face was a little pink and tender. My point is this: fire can hurt, destroy, wound, and produce fear.

“A worthless man digs up evil, while his words are like scorching fire.” Proverbs 16:27 NASB

How careful we should be to avoid letting our words become a devastating inferno. Instead, let’s strive daily with God’s help to speak with a pure heart, bringing grace, life, healing, and peace to those around us.

“All the utterances of my mouth are in righteousness; There is nothing crooked or perverted in      them.” Proverbs 8:8 NASB

[Digging deeper – Psalm 37:30; Prov. 11:9a, 12:6, 15:2, 28; 16:13b, 23; James 3:5-10]

Speaking rightly,

Beverly <><

 

 

Photo Credit: Image courtesy of jscreationzs at FreeDigitalPhotos.net; Image courtesy of pixabay.com

 

Part 2, Fitting Words for Unfitting Moments

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“Everyone enjoys a fitting reply; it is wonderful to say the right thing at the right time!”
Prov. 15:23 NLT

The silent atmosphere in the truck between Emory and me was tense. Miscommunication and assumption on both our parts had resulted in raised voices, heightened emotions, and blame. What had started out as a fun errand had turned into a sullied stand-off. Apologies and forgiveness were eventually given, but our careless words over an insignificant disagreement had been anything but right!

Our focus today will be on Proverbs 15. In this single chapter, we find several verses pertaining to the mouth and the good or bad it can bring in adverse situations with others. The choice is ours.

“Pleasant words are pure.” (vs. 26b, NASB).

Sounds simple enough, right? Yet, in the heat of the moment, our words are often anything but pure, much less pleasant. This simple instruction says not only do we need to be careful of what we say, but how we say it. Our words need to be clean, wholesome, and untainted. Likewise, if given in a welcome tone and humble attitude, others are more likely to receive them.

Verse 28 offers some how-to help for verse 26 –

“The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things.”

If you are a believer, then you are righteous because of what Jesus did on the cross for you. In the midst of conflict, turn to Him for strength to hold your tongue as you purposefully consider how you should respond. This doesn’t come easy for most of us. It takes practice and willingness to give up being right or having the last say in a dispute.

The following verses in Proverbs 15 offer two more options for us to consider.

 

“A gentle answer turns away wrath” (vs. 1a), and

“A soothing tongue is a tree of life” (vs. 4a)

– OR –

 

“…a harsh word stirs up anger” (vs.1b), and

 

 

 

“… perversion in it crushes the spirit” (vs. 4b).

Gentle and soothing is so much better than harsh and perverted, don’t you think? And who wouldn’t choose peace and life over anger and wounds? It takes maturity and discipline to contemplate and think before speaking. Yet, you can do it with God’s help!

I challenge you to consider the benefits of a ‘fitting reply’ and the joy it brings when we have right words to give. Let’s be life-givers, not life-crushers.

[Digging deeper – Ps. 141:3; Prov. 24:26, 25:11; 1 Peter 3:15]

Pondering my words,

Beverly <><

 

 

Photo Credit: Images courtesy of nuttakit at FreeDigitalPhotos.net